When I started blogging, I didn’t know what to expect. Sharing my life (our lives) online was a difficult decision that I didn’t make with haste. It took me a while, I dreaded that I would be called out as a bad mum or that I wasn’t good enough to be a blogger. But… I decided to go with it anyway.
It all started with Instagram. Instagram is my guilty pleasure, I love it. The community of mums and dads alongside all other followers has led to a supportive group of nearly 5 thousand strong. Then came along twitter and Facebook. The next step was to set up an actual website…. becoming an actual blogger. I mean… what does that even mean?
A ‘blogger’ in my eyes, once held such unreachable standards of which I would never achieve and I wasn’t sure if I would ever fit in a blogging world. I write with emotion and can be a tad sweary. If I am honest, I write how I like to read. I like quirky, honest and individual writing styles. That’s why I love bloggers like The Unmumsy Mum and Brummy Mummy of 2.
I remember nearly 4 years ago I didn’t stumble upon beauties like Sarah and Em, and when searching for mummy bloggers I could only find images of sleeping babies, whilst the mum drank a hot cup of tea and had a lovely sprig of holly just carefully positioned next to her romantic book that she has just finished reading. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love these accounts. I love seeing such brilliant photography and a beautiful image of a very content, happy baby and mummy but for me that was possibly the furthest from my reality as you could get.
In the early days with Florence, I would spend my entire night dancing around like a pillock singing rock a bye baby, cluster feeding her to sleep and barely showering never mind making a hot cup of tea. I too was happy and content, but my world looked more like a tornado had collided with a washing basket and whipped through the living room leaving sicky baby clothes and breastfeeding pads * insert a little fist bump to colic for those days*.
A hot cup of tea was reserved for when the other half came back from work in a similar dishevelled, sleep deprived state and took the reigns for a couple of hours before I had to clock back in.
So I never returned to the blogging world for support until I became pregnant with my second.
This time round, I found that, actually, there are mummy bloggers from all different walks of life. The mummy who breastfeeds/ bottlefeeds/ babywears/walks 10 miles pushing a pram…. the mummy who can put make up on/ the ones who can’t/don’t…. the feminist/ the empowering/ the honest/ the funny mummies…. even the scummy mummies.
Maybe 4 years ago, I didn’t look hard enough.
Maybe I didn’t need the support, because I had my husband every night being a fucking legend giving me a break while I got some sleep and my mum taking me for a boots meal deal while she cuddled the baby.
Maybe I just couldn’t be arsed with the comparison.
Either way, this time round, it was refreshing to find that motherhood wasn’t the same for everyone and that it’s okay not to be perfect. Something of which I advocate for.
As you all know I share my parenting fails, sly digs at my husband and the reality of parenting on a daily basis so I’m very much about sharing individuality and not feeling judged.
So, when it comes to following people to share the moments of motherhood/parenthood you are more likely to find solace in the familiar.
Gone are the days of gloriously placed advertising of nappies on a sleeping baby lay with its mama, who happens to have a full face of make up on and not a single hair out of place whilst in absolute pure happiness because the baby just farted rose petals. Gone are the days of perfect reviews for shit products. Don’t get me wrong you will see those but the majority are more honest, real mums who actually use the products and they work for them.
And yes, I get products sent to me and you will find that I will do sponsored posts where I feel that the product is good and I do actually really love it. What you will not see are the products I do not rate, because I will only show you the stuff that is good/helpful for a mummy/daddy.
So, do we need mummy bloggers?
Yes! We need the mummy bloggers who share how varied and different motherhood is. Whether that’s the perfect/ not so perfect/ scummy/ happy/ positive/ empowering or tonado riding mummy. We need them all, because every mummy needs a comrade in this world of parenting and for all those who don’t have a partner in crime to help them to raise up out of the trenches to laugh/cry/ rejoice in the whirlwind of parenthood.
It’s hard. Let’s be in it together.